Called to be the Worthy Wife

Homily, 11-19-23; Sunday of the 33rd Week in Ordinary Time, Cycle A:

Almost ten years ago, I accepted a three-month contract assignment working as an engineer at a manufacturing facility in Detroit. The company had ties to a French company, and so there were two young French men on two-year development assignments who were stationed in the same office space with me. One was from Senagal originally—he was a Muslim, although did not practice the faith of his parents. The other was an agnostic. What a wonderful opportunity for evangelization. I tried planting some seeds, but I don’t know if anything ever took root.

The agnostic was born to Catholic parents, but was not baptized as an infant—his parents wanted to allow him to make his own decision. And so he attended a form of religious education for a couple of years when he was about ten. He claims that nothing in the teachings touched him, and he made the decision not to be baptized. Though he could not see the beauty of the truth of Christianity, he was fascinated by the beauty of our church buildings throughout Europe. He pulled up pictures on his computer to show me many of the beautiful structures he had visited. He had even visited the Vatican. He could see the outer beauty, the cosmetic beauty, but not the inner beauty of the Church.

And many times it is like this in marriages. You see a young couple fall in love because they are smitten by each other—attracted to the physical appearance of each other. They can be attracted to exterior beauty that will not endure. They can be captured by the other’s charm which may deceive them. Only if the couple can come to see and know the inner beauty, will the marriage have the strong foundation to see it through the years. I knew a man once who commented that his wedding day, some thirty years earlier, must have been a cold day, because his wife’s beauty was frozen—she was as beautiful now as she was on the day they were married. He recognized the true beauty of his wife.

And in some cultures, marriages are pre-arranged by the parents. I’ve known a few couples that were brought together in this way. They were not necessarily in love when they got married, but were able to grow to love each other as they journeyed through live together. And, in a way, this is much how it is for most of us with regard to our faith. Unlike my friend from France, most of us were baptized as infants—it was arranged by our parents. Only later, during our journey through life, do we recognize and come to love the beauty of our Catholic Christian faith—at least we should. We should strive to recognize the true beauty of the Church, the Body of Christ, the Bride of Christ.

We are members of the Church; we are the bride, Jesus is our Bridegroom. We may not have chosen him at the time of our baptisms, but we should fall in love with Him by getting to know Him better. We should know that He loves us with the unselfish love we are called to exchange with our earthly spouses.

In our first reading today from the Book of Proverbs we hear a delightful poetic story extolling the qualities of a worthy wife. Some might react that this is sexist—where is the poem about the worthy husband? But if we remember that we, the Church, are the Bride of Christ, then we can reflect on how this passage applies to the Church, to each and every one of us. We can ask ourselves if we are acting as worthy wives to our spouse, Jesus Christ. Let me read the passage from Proverbs again. As I read it, reflect on whether you are a worthy wife as a member of the Church, the Bride of Christ.

When one finds a worthy wife, her value is far beyond pearls.

Her husband, entrusting his heart to her, has an unfailing prize.

She brings him good, and not evil, all the days of her life.

She obtains wool and flax and works with loving hands.

She puts her hands to the distaff, and her fingers ply the spindle.

She reaches out her hands to the poor, and extends her arms to the needy.

Charm is deceptive and beauty fleeting; the woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

Give her a reward for her labors, and let her works praise her at the city gates.

To Jesus, we are valued much more than pearls. He entrusts His heart to us. How do we respond?

  • Do we try to present ourselves as an unfailing prize before the Lord?
  • Do we bring good, and not evil, all the days of our lives?
  • Are we hard working and industrious in serving the Church to do God’s will; evangelizing and spreading the good news of salvation?
  • Do we fear the Lord?
  • Do we reach our hands out to the poor, and extend our arms to the needy?

God has given us all talents to use for the glory of the Kingdom. We need to use our spiritual gifts and talents, our charisms, to be a good spouse, to do our best for our spiritual family. We hear that the worthy wife will receive a reward for her labors. Her works will praise her at the city gates.

Creating a good relationship in a marriage is hard work. It calls for unselfish love. Creating a good relationship with Jesus also takes hard work. Jesus does, and has done, His part. We must act every day to put our talents to work to strengthen our relationship with Him for His glory. We are only on this earth for very short time. We all have God-given talents, and one day our Master will call us to settle accounts with Him. Will our works praise us at the heavenly gates? Will we receive a reward for our labors? Will we hear these words: “Well done, my good and faithful servant. Come share your Master’s joy”?

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